I’d like to take a survey of my customers as they enter the restaurant. Here are the questions:
Since the shortage of toilet paper, and a lack of brand choices, is your tuchas (rear end) more sore, less sore, or about the same?
What did you do when your natural roots began showing gray? Let it grow out au natural, buy the dye and do it yourself (and pray that someone is home to help), or go to the colorist in the still of the night?
Did you re-acquaint yourself with those metal nail clippers that cost about a dollar? Or use a scissor? Or let them grow out like Vicki in Carle Place?
Did you try to play hair stylist and focus on the terrible job, sides being uneven? Or how much money was saved?
Are you wearing clothing that you hadn’t worn in five years? ten years? fifteen years? Or do you just wear the same clothes every day because no one is seeing you anyway?
Did you gain as much weight as I did? Five pounds? Ten pounds? Or fifteen pounds? Let’s see if we make a match.
Did it just seem that we have more garbage now than we had pre-pandemic? Or is it now filled with empty cardboard boxes?
Have you started to measure your life in how long you can make the toothpaste last? Or the mouthwash? Or the Clorox wipes?
Did you realize that almost all your needs can be met by Amazon? A delivery company — vertically integrated — and conglomerate reaching into all businesses, facets of life and your personal business?
Lastly, and less irreverent, what can we do to better serve you? What will it take for you to come and eat in our indoor or outdoor restaurants and feel safe doing so? What can we do to enhance your take out experience? We are here… and have been here working hard to safely serve you and help get through these challenging times.
Stay well and safe.
See ya at the deli,
Simply Ronnie
